And I loved it. Swimming, weightless, the endless space of the ocean - I can't remember not wishing I could fly.
[She sounds angry, teeth gritted. And beneath that, pain. Even months later, some part of it is still raw.]
And then I came back and I - saw. And it was like everything they'd ever said about me was right, like everything would be so much better if I just -
- and it was all poisoned, and I hated myself, I felt so. Greedy and weak and hypocritical, and treacherous for wanting, and stupid and pointless for wanting not to want, why should I even bother trying to delude myself, of course everything is better with superpowers, and if it's that simple then my whole life didn't mean anything at all.
/spam
[She sounds angry, teeth gritted. And beneath that, pain. Even months later, some part of it is still raw.]
And then I came back and I - saw. And it was like everything they'd ever said about me was right, like everything would be so much better if I just -
- and it was all poisoned, and I hated myself, I felt so. Greedy and weak and hypocritical, and treacherous for wanting, and stupid and pointless for wanting not to want, why should I even bother trying to delude myself, of course everything is better with superpowers, and if it's that simple then my whole life didn't mean anything at all.