fridgetothefire | 027 ☣ some messages

[Private to Zane, Abigail, and Cassel, vaguetimed after the breach, Wednesday-ish?]

...how are you guys?

[Private to Ben, Wednesdayish]

Thank you.

[Private to Sylvanas, thursday]

[Her voice is small, nervous and tentative, though there isn't really fear in it, just uncertainty that she ought to be asking at all.]

I know we haven't spoken, much. I'm really sorry if this is - rude or painful, or anything, and you don't have to answer. I just.

You hate Arthas, right?

[Private to Mal, Friday, text, sent right before she dies]

I've decided to let Arthas make me a zombie for a few days. If all goes as planned, I will be able to resist any and all brain-eating urges. If it's messed up or he lied to me about what's going to happen, being killed will reset me to my normal self. I don't want any of the people who love me to have to do it. Could you check by Cabin 1x17 in the next few minutes and make sure I don't emerge on the warpath? If you don't want to, I'd trust Beatrix to do it too.

Thanks.

[Private to Arthas, Friday]

I'm ready. Is now good for you?

[OOC: I may add other starters to this post as older things play out/I think of them. If anyone has something they want to have brought up with Anya BEFORE she becomes a zombie, let me know and I will add it. There will probably be a separate public zombie post later.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Having your soul on the outside? It's like a - defect.

It really was.

It was awful. But I miss it too.

I don't know. I don't like not knowing.

[She wishes she could know him as she is now. The girl she was in the breach was a shadow of herself from before she came to the barge; she wonders, if they'd been separate all along, if she ever could have reconciled with herself. She wonders if she really has.]

Yeah.

[After a beat]

I was breach-family with my dad my first time, too. You probably won't always be.

[Anya doesn't venture any speculation in her tone as to how Abigail might or should feel about this. She just figures she might appreciate the information.]

You know all about him now.

[Him Hannibal, not him Anya's father. It's a little vicious, almost territorial. That's hers. It's ugly and wrong and foul but it's hers.]

We never spent a lot of time together, he and I.

[This is true; Anya was the strange stepchild off the streets, the feral cat Zane and Abigail coaxed in who always kept to far corners when Hannibal came close. He'd been reeling her in, gradually, and she'd been coldly, viciously eager to join his experiments, but it only happened at the very end, any extended collaboration cut short by their return to the barge. A concession of - something. Rightful domain, precedence. Anya knows what kind of man he is, has lived in his house, in the realm of his influence, but she was not made into his child. The weight of it, the nightmare, the impact, belongs to Abigail still. Anya only brushed through edges.]

I take it the breach was a...close translation, in his case?

Yes.

[Which she admits to only because no (an equally valid answer) would just invite more questions.]

It doesn't belong to you.

I know that.

[Solemn, sincere. She weighs things in her mind. Words only mean so much.]

He's. Interested in me. He saw some of the ways my father hurt me, and he's been using it to get into my head. I've been going along with it.

I'll stop, if you want me to.

[Or Abigail could tell him Anya said this, which would wreck her careful pretense of falling so easily for his ploys. It's more than an offer; she's given Abigail the power to make it happen.]

No.

[Her answer instantaneous, brittle, hedging on vindictive.]

I want to see what's going to happen.

[A pause, as she realizes who she sounds like. And then she snorts. It's not all that surprising.]

[She ducks her head, grins a little. She's reconciled herself to being very like Magneto; she's not going to gainsay it.]

Then I'll be sure to put on a good show.

I hope so.

Try not to die.

[She thinks: but Erik blasting him with lightening would definitely be a show.]

Any other advice?

Edited 2013-10-04 03:03 (UTC)

Ask Ben.

I'd been avoiding that.

[This isn't a refusal, just musing.]

But if you don't mind, then I will.

[She'd been avoiding it because Ben wouldn't have betrayed Abigail's secrets - and they are her secrets too - and Anya wouldn't have wanted to ask it of him.]

I don't care.

[She does care.]

Utilize your resources.

[I use the tools I have. How many times has she said that?]

Ben is a lot more than a resource to me.

[There's nothing sharp in her tone. Some people are resources first. That's okay. Capitalism makes the world go round. But that's not what they are to each other.]

But I'll ask now.

That's cute.

[It actually really is. She means it. But talking about Hannibal sends her flat-toned and brittle, so there's no real way of telling.]

Tell him I said I wanted your input.

He saved my life.

[That's the least of it. But perhaps that's why it is also the easiest to explain. This isn't sharp either, just a glimpse of context; she doesn't read anything personal - not about her, anyway - into Abigail's curtness. But she thinks it might be easier not to press any more, now.]

I'll do that, thank you. And if you need anything, let me know.

Edited 2013-10-04 03:47 (UTC)

Of course I will.

[But of course she won't.]

Good luck, Anya.

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